When is the last time you sat around a table with good food and good friends and just talked for hours? Those moments where you're so present with people that everything else slips away. 

Something about sharing food brings down our walls. It makes room for deep human connection. 

But what happens when we offer one without the other? 

I came across a recent article where a woman talks of a deeply personal story of pain and loss—left with two children after her husband lost a battle with cancer. She was desperate to feel support. While she talks beautifully of relying on Jesus for comfort and strength, she was confronted with something missing in her experience with Church.

“The Church does not need any more coffee bars. They don’t need the lighting. They don’t need the concerts. They don’t need the trendsetting. They don’t need couches on the platform. They don’t need to dim the lights to attract people. Tell a person how God has changed your life. Show them the love of God through your actions. Demonstrate how God helped you through the darkest of storms.”

Why does it have to be either/or?

In fact, great coffee or food can really set the stage for conversations about Jesus. And radical hospitality tells a story even before we open our mouths.

Take, for example, when you invite people over. You love your non-Christian friends. You want them to know Jesus. But would you sit down with them on your couch and just start talking directly at them about God? Probably not. You’d offer them a cup of coffee, a glass of water, maybe a cookie, or even a home-cooked meal. 

It’s a natural instinct for most of us. It’s our way of saying, “Hey, we really care about you and love and want you to feel comfortable.” 

Hosting is an extension of sharing the Gospel, showing we care so that our words don’t feel empty. 

This is the same principle we want to be following as a Church. Our deep love and conviction for the lost is exemplified in talk and action. We should go above and beyond to show people we care while also spending time caring for them. 

Let’s be real here, people are never going to come to your church only for the coffee; they can get that themselves at Starbucks. And they aren’t going to come to be entertained; they can watch NFL Sunday or go to the movies for that.

But people who feel genuine care are far more willing to care about you and your life, and that's where conversation happens about Jesus. That's where you can open up about what He's done in your life and in turn, they get to experience the grace and hope of Jesus.

Don't we want that? 

I’m glad that the author and her husband and her children had Jesus to rely upon in her hour of deepest need. But what about the billions of people who don’t know him? What would they have to fall back on in those dark moments?

Pope Francis said in Evangelii Gaudium that an evangelizing community "gets involved by word and deed in people’s daily lives; it bridges distances, it is willing to abase itself if necessary, and it embraces human life, touching the suffering flesh of Christ in others.”

Are we willing to bridge distances? Are we willing to go all-in for someone else so they can get to know Jesus?

Can we start by at least making some great coffee? 

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This article originally appeared at CanadianCatholic.net.